So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
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