yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Randomize
