Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
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