I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
whose parrot is this?
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Randomize
