I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Randomize
