People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
Randomize