Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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