whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Ladies, if you have recieved this text then you are one of the lucky few friends I have decided to make this proposal to. As you all know, my boyfriend's birthday is in two weeks and I have finally decided on the perfect present. Surprise threesome. Now, there can only be one, this isn't an orgy you know, so I will be rating the ideal candidates on bra size and sluttyness. Experiance will count, references if available. Inbox me your credentials so we can come to a...Satisfying agreement.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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