It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize