i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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