just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
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