so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
