Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize
