I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
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