i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
Randomize
