(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
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