There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Randomize
