I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
Randomize
