When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
