Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
