we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize
