Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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