He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
Randomize
