if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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