Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
