why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
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