You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Randomize
