she woke up with a sticky ear
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
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