doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize
