she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
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