I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
If I had a nickel for every time I've used a condom, I'd have... two nickels.
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
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