I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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