You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
