Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
