i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
