Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
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