i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
Randomize
