you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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