My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
Little spoons don't ask big questions
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
I use my feet as sexual weapons
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize
