Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
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