She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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