operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize