Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
Randomize
