If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
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