Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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