What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Randomize
