He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
