Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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