Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize
