the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
The power of my boobs compel you
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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